HOW TO GET SKINNY IN 10 STEPS?
WEEK 18/2025
I’ve hinted at it before but the fact is: I have been overweight. Massively overweight. Do you know these BMI calculators online? Well when I filled in my details it said: way too high. I kid you not. At my heaviest the scale produced 3 digits!
Let me take you back, and if you have read my columns you might already know this but I once used to play water polo with 9 training sessions a week.
When I injured my shoulder and had to undergo surgery that all stopped. On a Monday I had my first appointment in the hospital, the Monday after I doused myself into a deep sleep on the operating table. I had no time to prepare myself for the future. Nine training sessions a week means tons of calories a day just to keep me going.
To give you an example I ate nearly a loaf of bread a day. But who cares because I burned them all. Recovery from this surgery took me about a year and that was where I made a big mistake. I kept eating like I used to without burning it off. You can imagine what that does to one.
After six months I noticed the first stretch marks on my hips, legs and biceps. I must have gained at least 20kg.
When I quit waterpolo for good and moved out of the family home I let myself go completely. I literally ate whatever I wanted because it felt like freedom, no mum who was there to tell me off. No dad who gave me a judgy look when I helped myself to seconds at dinner time.
At some stage I had McDonald’s for breakfast, a bag of sweets as breakfast-dessert, eggs and toast for lunch with a bag of sweets for lunch-dessert and for dinner another round of McDonald’s. It disgusts me when I write this, damn it.
Well, you get the jist don’t you? With every bite I took, I lost a bit of myself and at the same time gained a bit…This went on for years.
Those three digits I was talking about earlier? 113kg.
Oh, and for your reference I am only 176cm tall (or short). So my BMI came to 36.5. A healthy BMI is between 18.5 and 24.9. Morbidly obese they call it. It sounds terrifying and honestly, it is. I struggled tying my shoelaces, climbing up stairs and even turning over in bed.
Loads of people made comments about my weight and how unhealthy I was. I don’t know why people feel at liberty to fat shame people. Comments like: “You’ve gained a lot of weight”, or "That t-shirt is a little tight”, or even "Why are you so big?”. I have heard it all. Don’t these people realise that I have a mirror too? I know I’m fat, I know I am unhealthy. I damn well know.
Years later I had to do a blood test at my doctor's office. The results were shocking. My cholesterol levels were way too high, they even referred me to a specialist in hospital. When I drove home I cried, proper ugly crying. I’d just turned 24 and if I kept going on like this I wouldn’t even make it to 40. I forgot to add I cried and ate a packet of biscuits cause hey, food was my comfort. I had to change my life if I wanted to live. I rolled down the window and tossed the half eaten packet of biscuits out. Sorry, Mother Nature…
To be fair, I didn’t know where to start. I was clueless. I had tried all diets known to mankind but I never succeeded. I had to do it differently this time.
I followed this cute, witty and funny Personal Trainer on Instagram. His reels were so funny, they really made me laugh out loud so I reached out to him. Luckily for me he replied within minutes. We planned a call for the next day and within a week I became part of his intense programme.
Don’t get me wrong, it was hard. I had to change my relationship with food, track calories, eat more protein, exercise more and step on the bloody scales every single day. I had to log all these things, every day, into a document for my PT to go over every single week. He would then send me a message with tips and encouragements. I wanted to give up multiple times. I had fallbacks multiple times. But now two years later, 27 kg lighter (yay me), I am happy, healthy and hot AF.
You are still waiting for the 10 steps aren’t you? A magical way to lose weight without doing anything for it? Well, this title is pure unashamed clickbait. Because losing weight is not done by 10 magical steps. It is done by YOU. You have to flick the switch, you will have to want it. It comes from within you. Dieting however is simple: eat less calories than you burn.
I do have a few tips for you though. Track your calories, up your protein and exercise more. Walk to the shop instead of taking the car, take the stairs instead of the elevator. Read the nutrition info on the back, and the thing that helped me the most is moderation. I still had take outs but fewer. I went for healthier options. It really is that simple. It’s hard, but simple.
I want to take this opportunity to thank my personal trainer Louis Baker-Stroud. I owe you my life, dude. You guided me through this and gave me all the tools I needed to get where I am now. So from the bottom of my heart, thank you!
Could I have done it alone? Probably. But asking for help isn’t a bad thing, you know.
Oh and give Louis a follow on Instagram, he really is hilarious. @louisbakerstroud
A new column by The Gay Bradshaw will be live next Sunday at 20:00h, exclusively on tobecroft.com/tgb